It Didn’t Start With You

November 7, 2018

It Didn’t Start With You is the title of one of the most influential books I read last year. It was one of those “yes yes, science has proven what I have instinctively experienced myself” moments.

A Psychology lecturer in America, the author Mark Wolynn is an expert in how inherited family drama shapes who we are, and how to end the cycle. He explained the science of epigenetics so clearly. I understood properly for the first time how the genes we inherited from our ancestors can be imprinted with information from traumatic experiences they experienced, and that it is possible to heal this.

Over the past ten years I have pulled together my own family tree, built relationships with unknown ancestors who I have become very close to and worked to break down the unhelpful family patterns which I have inherited. It has been an incredible journey, weaving together Shamanism, Psychotherapy, and Genealogy. A few years ago I begun to work with others to support them in the same way, and it has been a long time dream of mine to bring this forward into a core part of what I do in the World.

So, it was really great to stumble upon Mark’s book and read about this work from the perspective of a well respected psychology scientist. It complemented what I had experienced through healing my own ancestral line through Core Shamanic methods.

I know that many, many people on a spiritual path are drawn to ancestral healing.

So, I would love to know…

what key questions do you have about breaking down old ancestral patterns and healing your ancestral line?

Please click on this link to tell us.

I would love to hear them.

Thank you! Nicola


About the Author


Nicola Smalley is an edge-dweller, shamanic practitioner and writer living in Anglezarke on the edge of the West Pennine Moors in Lancashire, England.
Following a career in corporate sustainability, she now runs The Way of the Buzzard with her husband Jason. Her passion is anything connected to nature and the mysteries of the Earth.

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  1. Dear Nicola,
    I have to thank you deeply from my heart. Your last blog touched me verry much. Wenn I wrote the words: “It did’nt start with you” I felt a kind of energie that electrified me.i got the book und startet reading… reading,,, reading. The way Mark Wolynn described the shadows of our ancesters, hit me totally.
    Most of what he wrote I know already, but it was not so much in my feelings. Und that is what hapend. This words:
    “It Did’nt Start With You” worked like a key inside me.
    I’m reading this book and I’ll work with it among friends. (Wherever is interested)
    Igot this book in German. The title is:
    “Dieser Schmerz ist nicht meiner”
    It will be my winter studies.
    I’m grateful for your blogs. There ist always something to learn about life.
    Thank You! for what you and Jason do!
    Anne Hopf

    1. Hi Anne, I am so pleased the book title resonated with you and that you are enjoying it. Fantastic that you are going to share the journey with friends through the winter. Thank you so much for your thanks! This is lovely for us to hear 🙂

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